I love this poem by Rumi. He expresses a clear understanding of the complexity of being human. Every day parts of us show up. Sometimes parts of us show up that we enjoy, and sometimes parts of us show up that are difficult or challenging. The path to healing includes embracing all these different parts, learning to listen to their unique and important messages, finding out which parts tend to take the lead and control situations, allowing conversations to happen between our parts, and ultimately learning to love and embrace each part.
You will find in these pages that I continually emphasize relationship. Our relationship with ourselves, as Rumi so eloquently states is our foundational relationship as adults. This is the relationship that provides the platform for all other relationships we create. It is our model for how generous and loving we can be with other humans as they struggle and as we come into inevitable conflicts. As humans, we need relationships with other humans. We are biologically designed to be in relationship. Often people come to therapy because their deepest wounds are activated in relationships. When these wounds are activated you might feel unfamiliar to yourself, overwhelmed, dissatisfied, frustrated, angry, or any combination of difficult feelings. One (of the many!) incredibly healing ingredients in therapy is the relationship, where new experiences of encouragement, trust, compassion, and feeling seen can emerge to heal old relationship wounds and to create new possibilities for a more fulfilling future.
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Expanding through Awareness
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.